Bhiggo

superbhiggo: I know the way you feel I know it ain’t too good...

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 03:21:21 -0400

I know the way you feel I know it ain’t too good
I know it feels like there’s detergent in your blood
But don’t you worry, gonna make you feel alright
I’m gonna lift your black depression, help you through the night
I’m your man, you know I’ll help you if I can
Cos I’m your Doctor
I know you’re desperate, I really sympathise
I see the morbid horror flicker in your eyes
But rest assured I’m gonna help to ease your pain
I’m gonna put a thousand tiny implants in your brain
I’m your boy, I’ll make you undulate with joy
Cos I’m the Doctor

Don’t get too depressed, I’ve found a way to help your case
A little hypodermic sends you into outer space
You’ll feel much better when you take these little pills
I’m gonna give you 60 bottles, I believe in overkill
Heart attack, you know you’re never coming back
Cos I’m the Doctor

maythefoxbewithyou: Vader looooves the down comforter!

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 22:38:14 -0400

maythefoxbewithyou:

Vader looooves the down comforter!

niknak79: Freedom

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 19:13:44 -0400

niknak79:

Freedom

kavikdavasgo: 9) I don’t mind going back to jail.10) If you...

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 19:13:39 -0400

kavikdavasgo:

9) I don’t mind going back to jail.
10) If you stick it in her butt I’ll stick it in yours.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence these are next to each other on the list… This dad’s a prison pimp. :O

Photo

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 17:08:01 -0400

goatpox: dragonitehugs: returnerofthesky: ah really good NO...

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 17:07:56 -0400

goatpox:

dragonitehugs:

returnerofthesky:

ah

really good

NO NO N NO N O N ON NO NO ON NO NO NONO NOON NON N NOON ONOOOOOO

NINTENDO YOU ARE GOING TO GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK.

Photo

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 15:39:21 -0400

Photo

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 13:30:42 -0400

kavikdavasgo: chelseachickadee: #I BROUGHT YOU A...

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 13:30:37 -0400

kavikdavasgo:

chelseachickadee:

#I BROUGHT YOU A THING #HERE #IT’S A THING

Seen this damn little ball of adorbs on my dash for days now…

WELL NOW I AM REBLOGGING HIM! BECAUSE ADORBS!

laughingsquid: Hairy Stockings For Young Chinese Girls To Fend...

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 13:22:08 -0400

laughingsquid:

Hairy Stockings For Young Chinese Girls To Fend Off Perverts

terra-mater: 15 amazing things in nature you won’t believe...

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 13:22:03 -0400

terra-mater:

15 amazing things in nature you won’t believe actually exist

Source

facts-i-just-made-up: 8-tec: facts-i-just-made-up: Xbox One...

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 13:17:25 -0400

facts-i-just-made-up:

8-tec:

facts-i-just-made-up:

Xbox One Controller Features Biometric Security

In an attempt to quell the bad publicity generated by certain E3 announcements, Microsoft has announced a second round of features for the Xbox One, starting with its controller.

Most technologically advanced of these features are the biometrics. Both thumbsticks feature fingerprint readers that can instantly recognize the player. This will not only allow users to sign in with a simple touch, but for the system to deny access to unregistered players who haven’t paid the guest charge.

Pretty high tech stuff, but not the centerpiece of the new controller when it comes to functionality. The “Impulse Trigger” rumble motors will provide a new level of depth to gameplay. While the concept of a rumble pack goes all the way back to StarFox 64, the new Impulse system goes farther than any system to date to become one with the player. The trigger buttons both feature several tiny needles that (painlessly) penetrate the player’s fingers to deliver intense (painful) electrical shocks, while simultaneously sampling DNA and minor changes in blood chemistry that will let the game change to better fit the mood and, says Microsoft, even the ethnicity of the player.

“We at Microsoft feel that the best Xbox games should be reserved only for the Aryan race,” said spokesman Francis Sham, “As most games will prove too demanding for degenerate bloodlines or “Mudbloods” as we call them, the controller will deny them access to most of our early releases. We still intend to cater to these audiences of course, and will be releasing games designed for them down the road that have been simplified for their inferior minds.

Though this biometric system will be included in all Xbox One controllers, the modifications will prove costly so all previously ordered consoles will be shipped without any controllers, which will be sold separately for $299 each. The consoles won’t work without them and Microsoft is only manufacturing 700 in time for the release, so order yours today!

“to deny access to unregistered players who haven’t paid the guest charge”

you have to fucking pay to just be a guest that is just asinine!

That’s not even the half of it. The guest charge isn’t billed to you, the recognition software actually figures out who you are and deducts it straight from your bank. So basically you can just be in the same room as people playing Xbox One and automatically lose money.

The billing rate is apparently $4.99/half hour with an added “Happy hour” charge of $12.99 if the system detects that you’re having fun.

The suggested course of action by the NSA (Which is investigating the legality of Microsoft’s plans) is to simply shun anyone who buys an Xbox One, don’t go to their houses at all, don’t even speak to anyone who buys one of these things and protect your family from the facial recognition scanners. From the official statement by NSA Spokesman Kevin Dodson, “Just lock up yo kids, yo wife, and yo husband cause they scanning everyone out there.”

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Mon, 17 Jun 2013 21:05:40 -0400

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Mon, 17 Jun 2013 19:52:29 -0400

Photo

Mon, 17 Jun 2013 13:05:08 -0400

dnotive: 4ngelo: theodorepython: miami-tea: The...

Mon, 17 Jun 2013 13:05:02 -0400

dnotive:

4ngelo:

theodorepython:

miami-tea:

The Defibrillator Toaster

My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”

“DON’T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!!! NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC’S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT!!!”

He’s bread, Jim.

Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M

If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast!

JESUS CRUST.

JAM IT!

“Daddy’s in a butter place now, kids.”

I WASN’T EVEN GOING TO REBLOG UNTIL I SAW THE SHIT TON OF PUNS

HES BREAD JIM

JESUS CRUST

OMG IT’S BACK

2460onetruepairing: maccasmiz: fulfillments: living-the-band-l...

Mon, 17 Jun 2013 13:04:29 -0400

2460onetruepairing:

maccasmiz:

fulfillments:

living-the-band-life:

foxheartx:

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH.

OMG

OMG LOOOOLLL I’M SO DONE

I’ll always reblog this, this is just too big of a burn.

tmirai: lokilordofdickery: incineraptor: lexxerduglas: clorin...

Mon, 17 Jun 2013 03:00:09 -0400

tmirai:

lokilordofdickery:

incineraptor:

lexxerduglas:

clorinspats:

shade-rartblog:

thewingedshadow:

elliotexplicit:

cineraria:

How to Fold a Shirt in Under 2 Seconds - YouTube
伊東家の食卓

I just did this. Legit.

the fuck

Clearly this is black magic at work here

been folding my shirts like this for so long that it feels weird to do it any other way

WHAT THE SHIT

i did this just now completely skeptical and when it worked i just fell over onto my bed and sobbed into my blanket

THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING.

Just did this shit. It works.

WITCHCRAFT.

niknak79: Nothing to see here

Sun, 16 Jun 2013 18:40:23 -0400

niknak79:

Nothing to see here

Greatness Awaits (by PlayStation)

Sun, 16 Jun 2013 18:37:36 -0400

Greatness Awaits (by PlayStation)